Burning the Bible: Last stages of editing

The long awaited for moment is here at last. Courtney Crass's first novel, Burning the Bible, has finally reached the last stages of editing. In the next few months, she will start to find an agent and publisher for her creation.

Burning the Bible is a story where a modern day Sodomn and Gomorrah has come to pass. Long ago the lord asked for 10 good men to be produced to save the cities of Sodomn and Gomorrah. Ten good men could not be found and those cities were destroyed. The lord is upset over the workings of the modern world and has decided to vent his wrath-unless one good person can be found. One idealistic young man is set the task of finding this good person. His task proves to be a more difficult than he had ever imagined and over the course of his disillusioning search, he finds darkness lurking in suprising places and love where he least expects it. Will this love be enough for him to be deterred from his course or will he stay true to his values? As time quickly runs out, twists and turns in the path lead to an unusual ending.

For more about Burning the Bible, e-mail Courtney Crass at gabcc89@yahoo.com.

Happy Reading!

Facing Your Fears: Fear of Cows

Bleary eyed in the morning, I used to stand at the lonely country bus stop to await the school bus. As a young girl growing up in the country, this was a normal experience-or would have been except for an irrational fear that I harbored. You see, I had this fear of cows that I just could not seem to shake. Although I knew that it was irrational, the logic of it did not matter for me. What mattered was the monstrosity that watched me from the neighboring field as I waited every morning.

Most people-wrongly- are not afraid of cows. Pictures of happy cows on commercials or dainty cow statues perpetuate this false idea. Cows are one of the most fearsome animals ever in existence. Still in doubt? Think again.

Standing at the stop sign in the misty, chilly morning, my hands would stay huddled in my pockets as I shivered and warily watched the creatures that marred my existence across the way. Mooing menacingly, they chewed their cud. Normally this would not be a cause for alarm, but again you see, these are not your cartoon cows. Munching roughly upon their cud, every chew seemed destined to be a warning for me. Stay away, they seemed to say, or this could be you. No matter how long I stood there, they did not change this attitude and instead, the chewing grew stronger taking on a ferocious intensity seconded only by the intensity I had occasionally seen my roommate take when approaching girls. The girl would say hello politely before walking away and he would stare intently, following her and hovering with a decidedly creepy focus until she would be forced to leave the room. The next day he would bemoan the fact that this girl did not like him and I would be too kind hearted to tell him that if he was put in a police lineup with a serial killer, a rapist, and a cow, the only one who would beat him for creepy, haunting intensity would be my bovine friend who scrutinized me from across the street.

The disturbing roommate would not be around for years yet. The problem at hand still was my fear of cows. Huddled behind the stop sign for protection, the occasional peek I chanced only ascertained my greatest fears. Long ago, the cow must have been a fearsome creature. Before it was domesticated and forced to be a beast of burden, the sight of a frantic, stampeding herd of cows must have been a great cause for alarm. An alarm that I, sensitive to the workings of the world, still felt. You may laugh at my fear of cows, but you were not there. The giant, two ton beast mocked me from across the way and as it chewed it’s cud, the threat of an imminent stampede was obvious. Writing this, my fear is slightly allayed either by the psychological relief of letting my fears out into the world, or by the reassuring presence of the hamburger in my hand.

Stairway to Heaven (Tsaoling Historic trail Hike in Taiwan)

Yesterday I went for a event filled hike on the Tsaoling Historic Trail in Taiwan. The day -and hike- started normally enough, I hopped a train to Daxi and napped on my way there. On arrival, I realized I had no clue where I was going and it had started to rain. Tired, I trudged onward until a sign pointed me in the direction of the trail. Still overcome with sleep, the crooning of birds and insects took on a malevolent tone and the stairs seemed to be never ending. To top it off, as  I was crossing a slightly overgrown section of trail, I looked up in time to see that I was about to pass under a giant spider! Being me, I had to place a phone call to Kamil to make sure that it wasn't going to eat me. Memories of disovery channel episodes rushed through my head and I distinctly remembered one kind of spider that jumped from its web to catch its prey. It seemsunlikely now, but at that particular moment, it seemed quite likely that this could be one of those, just a people eating variety.Not completely reassured by Kamil, I tucked my arms underneath each other and made as small a target as possible as the spider above me watched, mockingly., When I was content that as little skin area was showing as could be possible, I rushed under the web, darting up the stairs and almost ran head first into another giant spider web. Darting around that spider, I continued up the path, staring into the sky looking for more spiders. At this point I spotted a third, and completely terrified by the three spiders I'd seen in succession, I topped looking up, realizing that I'd rather just not know.
      Now, one of the reasons I love to hike, is the complete sense of freedom I feel at the top of the mountain, the almost nirvana like state I reach having earned that right to stand on the top of a mountain and have the gods send their wind running through my hair, the sky, mountains , and ocean meeting together in a great expanse at my feet. I  think though, that the gods are tired of alowing me to just walk up a mountain to gain the peak, first I must pass a series of test. I say this, not out of some misguided notion, but out the next event in my travels, following the spiders.  For it wasn't terribly long after that that I encountered my next test. Walking through the trees, my eyes firmly avoiding the sky, I heard a noise to my left and saw rustling among the leaves. Freezing in a terror compunded by giant spiders, I wanted as a  a large (as long from my fingertips to fingertops) grey snake slithered out from the left side of the trail. Completely frozen, only my eyes moved, bugging out in terror. I had seen snakes on my last hiking trip, but htis one was different, this one was gigantic and looked distinctly like the snake whose venom I had once drank in snake alley. After it left I ran up the stairs as fast as I could. I encountered a man who warned me in chinese of the slippery steps, but I was still too distracted by my critter encounters to listen. Going down a rocky, wet slope, I end up slipping,sliding partway down the mountain and getting a cut on my hand and bruises to boot.
    A bit farther up the mountain  I turned a corner to see a huge grey animal's bum with a tail swishing. Having watched far too many disney cartoons and dsicovery channel specials as  a child, I recognized it as an elephant. Which gave me a seconds pause as I tried to remember if elephants were ever known to attack. Getting closer(camera ready ofcourse) , I realize that it was actually a water buffalo.
         The next hour of my hike was by and large uneventful. I reached the tsaoling valley and got to walk across the great expanse the grasslands moving in the breeze. I saw the Earth God's shrine and  more water buffalo. My fear had long since left me. At the start of any journey fear is logical, but after halfway it's irrevelant.  I could no longer turn back so whenever I felt spider webs I just shook my head, and I stopped jumping at every gecko or giant butterfly that flew by my face. Exhausted and sweating ridiculously on top of the peaks, I realized that I happened to have an umbrella in my bag that could block out the sun. Having not brought nearly enough water, I couldn't intake more liquids, I could only try not to lose as many.

        Finally starting the last 4 km of my 15 km hike, I checked out a cool tiger inscription from years ago and began the descent. My right knee aching and groaning over the extra work I'd forced it to do , I tried to enjoy the view and concentrate on my end goal. Absorbed in thoughts, and lost in my nirvana like traveling state of mind, I didn't know the cloud of bees until  I was within them. Assuming that my mind was just tired (come on, clouds of bees only happen in stories right?) I tucked my arms closer and kept going, hopping it was just exceptionally big and angry mosquitos. Unfortuantely, at the bottom of the trail, I found a warning sign about the dangers of the bees in the area and what to do if you encounter them, or disturb them as I had. Apparnelty continuing to walk was not the correct choice, but fate-or my jade talisman-were with me, and I had come out OK.

       Reaching the ranger station, I raided the vending machines and spent the remainder of the hike altenrnating between gatorade, pepsi, and two bottles of water until  I reached the temple at Dali.

 

Pictures from the hike in Taiwan

Bug Wars in Taiwan

So I was leaving my apartment today and accidently bumped into a winged dung-beetle-meets-cockroach kind of insect. Screaming, I ran inside to frantically pour cups of bleach onto it through the screen. I’m pretty certain this isn’t the best method of dealing with such an issue, but I’m adverse to touching it and Taiwan doesn’t let you own guns. Running out of bleach, I morbidly watched it as it flailed about and struggled to fly. Gazing at me, it gave me the look. Not the angry kind of look, it was past that. Rather it’s glance said that in the ensuing days, I should watch out, for it would call it’s brethren and they would descend upon me and my belongings in a bleach induced hysteria and eat me. Panicing, I waited for it to crawl out of sight before I rushed out of the house. Pushing the elevator button, I counted the seconds as the elevator slowly ascended, my thoughts distracted by a slithering, sliding sound I heard from someone floors below. On a normal day, I would assume that this was a person moving things, but today I knew that anything was possible. The dark  hall was lit only by the ominous green glow of an exit sign as I continued to listen to the slithering noise growing ever close. Finally, the elevator came. Throwing myself into the light interior of the elevator, I hoped that the bugs would be confused by my descent and I could escape to a place that had a decent, if not significant, supply of bug bombs.
You may think this extreme, but then-you see- it was very big. And could fly and hissed at me. As I write now, I still shake, not from fear, but from the jittery, shaky feeling you get from prolonged terror. Pure, undiluted terror that will only leave at a time when I can return home, wearing bleach bottles like armor and throwing in bug bomb grenades to face the horde that will have enveloped my house in the time I have spent in hiding here. But I’ll be ready, you’ll see.
You’ll see.

Teaching Kindergarten in Taiwan

Recently, I covered my coworkers yo-yo class-which consists of ten 1-3 year olds. I thought I was up to the challenge until a child came up to me with a kleenex and the cry of “Teacher, teacher!”
"Thats cool,” I say, “Nice kleenex!” At this he motions again.
“Teacher, teacher!”
” Yea!” I say. ” I know, that is so cool! Very cool Kleenex. You are sooo smart.”
Then I realize, that whats he’s pointing to is his runny nose. Understanding sinks in, and I realize a second thing- this is so out of my ball park. Whose idea was it to put me in charge of a class that consists of mini me’s? I think about this for a second and in my moment of distraction, one child falls against another starting a kind of domino effect with my class, culminating in my directors little daughter hitting the ground. Inwardly, I groan as I look around for the chinese teacher to save me and make things better. Quite seriously, I think I would die without having a chinese teacher in my class. Children are quite awesome, but they randomly cry, and cry in Chinese, which slightly hinders my ability to help them.
Chinese teachers are also amazing because the first day they met me, and several times in ensuing days and weeks, they told me I look like a movie star. I’m not entirely sure how exact this descriptor is, but I tried posing in the mirror the other night, and I must say, I totally see it. I was less enthused though when Renee actually named a movie star the other day…Lindsay Lohan. It took me several minutes to unravel exactly what this description was supposed to mean. I immediately tossed out the excessively thin aspect, and (I hope) the drugs and rehab one. Without these two things though, I think that leaves me with The Parent Trap, which is even more confusing.